Heart Thoughts

Oh, Lord!!!! I need you! I always need you ... my need never ends ... it never even starts to dwindle ... because I am NOTHING without you. I can do NOTHING without you. I don't even wanna try. Please forgive me for the times that I go off on my own ... the times when I let my pride or worries get in the way. Help me to trust you with my ENTIRE being - with all that I am, Lord, help me to know your will and do it!

Lord, there are so many things on my heart tonight. I want to help my hurting kids. I want a husband. I want further training in my calling. I want to solve all the problems of all those who hurt. I want to be ALL for you ... the complete woman of God you've called me to be. I want to be full of grace and truth instead of worry and hypocrisy and lacking trust in you.

Lord, please help me. Help me trust you. Help me grow in you. Help me simply talk to you. Please discipline me, Lord ... to spend more time with you ... to take better care of myself ... to serve others first.

Lord, I pray for your guidance. You know that I want to serve in this mighty calling you've placed on my life .... with all that I am, I want to do my best with SoZo! But I feel so inadequate! Please help me trust that you will bring the right people to serve at the right time, that you will use my skills and my weaknesses to strengthen my kids in a way that only you can because you are made strong in my weaknesses. Help me trust you with this, Lord. But also ... help me know your will. You know I want further training ... please help me seek your face for direction. Do you want me to go back to school? And for what exactly? Do you want me to stay here? I will. I will, Lord. Are you going to bring me a husband to love me and push me to love you more? Will we work in ministry together? How will you provide for the needs of my kids? I love them more than life ... but I am at a loss to help them overcome their pain and struggles. Help me realize that it is not I who can help them ... but you. How will you do it? Will you do it soon? ..... What will come of this little life?

Lord! Wherever you want me. Whatever you want me to do. I will do it. I will go, Lord. Give me peace and strength in the waiting process. I do love you. I do trust you ... deep down. Don't let my flesh tell me otherwise. You are Lord. You are God. You are the One who is mighty to save ... mighty to lead ... mighty to overcome my weaknesses and sin ... mighty to love me completely ... mighty to use me for your glory ... mighty. Thank you, Jesus, for your mighty purpose for my life. Teach me to trust you with all of my heart and mind. Teach me to maintain an eternal perspective so that I can honor you with my life. Teach me to know you better and love you more. I love you, Lord. Please .... be glorified in me. I give you all the glory and honor and praise and utmost devotion tonight ... for your abundance of grace and love and strength ... and Lord ... because you ARE the Lord ... because you ARE my God. Thank you for being the master and ruler and sustainer and savior of my life. Oh Jesus, thank you. Thank you.

GoG 109: The Frog-Kisser

I, Mical Masterson, am working towards a lofty goal: I want to be a frog-kisser.

Hahaha! I thought about just leaving it at that. That could be a great GoG - Mical wants to be a frog-kisser. The end. .... But no! I won't do that to ya.

I am being serious. I do want to kiss frogs. But let me explain this. It's not what you think. ;)

I went to a youth pastor's conference back in February. Boy, it was great! So refreshing! .... I went to a group of sessions in which Jeanne Mayo was the speaker. She's a veteran youth pastor .... and her sessions were so great! During one of the four sessions, she talked about frog-kissing. .... I'm sure you've heard the story about the prince who had been turned into a frog, and the only way to break the spell was for a princess to kiss him. ... Well, Jeanne compared the frog to youth.

I'm sure that princess didn't want to kiss that frog. Frogs are slimy, and the word is, they have warts. Pretty sure I wouldn't want to kiss a frog. But the princess believed that the frog would turn into a handsome, well put-together prince. So she kissed him. And he did, indeed, become a prince. .... Good news, right?

Well, youth ministry works the same way. Us youth pastors? We're the princesses. Our kids? Now, they are the frogs. They come into our youth groups with all kinds of drama, baggage, insecurities, problems - warts of all kinds .... and we, the princesses, are supposed to (and we desire to as well!) touch those warts, get our hands dirty trying to help them overcome those nasty little things ... even kiss 'em!!!!

It's a great analogy, really. Just like the princess was called upon to help the frog turn into a prince, youth pastors are called by God to help young people become God-fearing men and women. Now, see here ... GOD does the changing! But He uses us to do it. .... Gosh. That's really cool to think about. The Creator of the Universe chose ME to help turn my little frogs into princes and princesses of the Most High God. Amazing! I'll keep this calling ... thank you very much. :)

Youth ministry is challenging to say the least. It really takes a lot out of you. Some of those frogs have mighty big warts that you'd rather just cut off and throw out instead of kiss. But God has called me to be a frog-kisser. He wants me to give my kids a "kiss of encouragement," as Jeanne put it so well. So that is what I will do. No matter how nasty the warts, no matter how crazy or obnoxious or hurt-filled the frog, I will love my kids as God loves them .... and I will kiss 'em week after week. So ... like I said. I want to be a frog-kisser. :)

GoG 108: The Run

I got back to running yesterday! It's been months since I ran last. Lame, I know. I go in spurts. I'll run for a couple of months pretty consistently, and then I'll stop for a longer amount of time ... then start back up again.

But running at the park yesterday was a glimpse of grace because ... well, I did it! I'm more out of shape than I've probably ever been .... but I did it! It was a small victory! But it counts. And guess what? I ran today too? It was miserable, but I did it.

Ha! That's kind of a goofy GoG. Oh well, it's the simple things, right? God's grace can be simple as well as profound! :)

GoG 107: The SoZo Prayers

For the past several weeks, we've been praying for specific prayer requests at the end of each youth group meeting. We take down requests, and then I ask the kids to pray for the requests out loud. My glimpse of grace for Sunday night was listening to them pray. ... Now, I don't want to brag, but I've got some really good prayers in my group. My kids are hesitant to volunteer to pray, but they are so good at it! I tell them that almost every week. It was just such a blessing to hear my kids talk to God. It made me smile really big. :D

GoG 106: The Abundance

Whew! 4 more posts to go, and I'll be caught up. ... Gotta get those GoGs in! :)

This past Saturday, I was at the church getting ready for Sunday morning's lesson during youth Sunday School. We were having our pancake breakfast fundraiser that morning, so there wouldn't be a lot of time for a lesson ... so I was pondering on something short. Short but powerful. :) ... I've been thinking on God's abundance a bit lately. One of my favorite verses in all of scripture is the second part of John 10:10 when it says ... "Jesus came that we might have life and have it abundantly!" Mmm mmm! That is such good stuff!

So I grabbed a concordance and started looking for the word "abundant"/"abound"/"abundance" in the Bible. I found some verses about God's abundance of provision, God's abundance of grace, God's abundance of rejoicing .... and also, God's abundance of life. ... It was great to just think on God's abundance.

The word abundance is defined as "more than enough; amply sufficient; plentiful."

And if you think about that definition in correlation with God, it's really good stuff. God is "more than enough" for us. And His many abundances are "more than enough" in our lives. His many abundances are His grace. And isn't that what we're focusing on this year? Why, yes. Grace. God gives us an abundance of grace. We just need to be watching for it. :)

GoG 105: The WIN!

My brother won his first collegiate track meet!!!!!!!!!

Last Friday night, Wes ran the 800 meter race (that's half a mile) against several other schools ... I heard the number 15 thrown around that night - 15 colleges competed in his track meet last weekend, and HE WON!!!!! He beat all the other runners in the 800 meter!!!!!

156:88

That's pretty fast!

He was so excited! .... He's worked so hard! And it was such a blessing to see him win.

GoG 104: The God of All Comfort

I go to something called W.O.W. every other Thursday (soon-to-be Tuesday) night. It's a Bible study with a handful of women from Grace Fellowship ... WOW - Women of Worth. We're going through a book about significance ... how we look at ourselves, how we look at others, digging deep - good stuff. We've only had a few weeks of it, but it's been so great!

A terrific woman named Katie is apart of our group. I went to high school with Katie. She was a senior when I was a freshman. We knew each other a bit then, but it's weird and great to see how we're crossing paths again now - hanging out with each other - now after so many years. Well, during our Bible study, we dig kind of deep with each other. We share personal things ... things that sometimes lead to tears or at least noticeable emotion. .... A couple weeks ago, Katie shared some things that I totally identified with. And this past week, she shared some even deeper stuff that I identified with even more. She had gone through some of the same hurt and guilt that I've gone through - in a similar situation too! And I was so blessed to hear about her trials. Not that I wanted her to be in pain, but it was such a blessing - such an act of God's grace - to bring someone to this Bible study who has gone through similar trials .... someone who is older and who has overcome those trials. And it helped me further realize that God uses our trials to make us stronger but also comfort others.

The first part of 2 Corinthians chapter 1 talks about how God comforts us in our trials so that we can comfort others in their trials. And what a gift that is! It doesn't feel like a gift when we're going through those hard times, but God has a greater purpose for those times. And I got just another glimpse of that at our last WOW meeting. Thank you, Lord, for this special glimpse of your grace.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

GoG 103: The To Do List(s)

I'm a crazy woman.

Yes. If I don't write something down as soon as I hear about it, it will be as if it was never assigned to me. My desk is always piled high with index cards and post-it notes full of the things on my to do list. Sometimes, I'll condense the note cards onto a piece of paper to cut down on the clutter .... 'cause oh. my. word. It's madness sometimes! .... Well, now that I have an office at the church ... yes, Mical Masterson has an office! ... I have a second desk to pile post-it notes on. So in effort to condense my post-its once again, I wrote everything down on a piece of paper and entitled it "Wednesday's to do list" ... and then I realized that I was gonna come into the church again on Saturday, so I made another to do list for Saturday.

The funny part of the story is that .... I was in the church office (the one next to Pastor Roger's office instead of the SoZo office) finishing up the last few things on my Wednesday to do list ... and Pastor Roger was getting ready to leave. Now, when I cross off everything on one of my many to do lists, I get pretty excited. Sometimes I even dance. Well, I got excited and said, "Look (signaling to Pastor Roger - I had to show him I was accomplishing something!)." And I crossed off the last couple things on my list. And said, "I'm done!" And Pastor Roger let out a chuckle. But then I turned my paper over to Saturday's to do list .... and we both laughed.

As we left the building and locked up, I looked at pastor and said, "So, I was laughing at myself as I walked back to the youth room to get my stuff to leave because I got all excited to have everything done on my checklist just to turn it over and have just as much if not more on the other side. ... It's pretty funny if you think about it." Ha! And it was. You had to be there to see how funny it was .... but pastor and I had a good laugh about it. .... I am such a crazy woman. Too funny!

GoG 102: The Dunes

Last week, I took a solitude day trip to the Indiana Dunes. What a marvelous afternoon! .... I love Michigan Lake. It's one of my favorite places to be. I love the mountains, and I love lakes. If I ever moved away from my little town, I would move to either Michigan near the lake or Tennessee in the mountains. Mmm .... I love 'em!!!!

So I took a day trip to the dunes .... I sat next to the lake and read. I walked along the shoreline letting the waves hit my feet while running my fingers over the smoothest rock I've ever touched. I sat next to the lake, digging my feet into the sand, closing my eyes, and breathing in the brisk lake air and feeling the warm sun on my back. I listened to the waves crash against the sand. I watched little kids play in the waves and sand. I wrote prayers in the sand as I walked. I just took it all in.

God made something as wonderful and amazing as Lake Michigan, and I got to experience it for 4 glorious hours last Tuesday. And that, my friends ... is grace.

GoG 101: The New Perspective

It's funny how a lot, if not most, of my blog posts turn out to be so much longer than I plan. Ha! Like GoG 100 .... didn't mean to talk about my life purpose statement at all. Ha! But I did. What fun! ... And look, I'm already making this post longer than I planned. Ahh, what a Mical moment. :)

More about perspective ... not so much eternal this time ... but still interesting ... and full of grace. :) .... I took a walk in the park last Monday night with a couple of my SoZo kids. We had taken our Bible study to the park that night ... finished up early ... and decided to take a quick walk before heading back to the church. We took a short trail around the park ... it's the same trail I blogged about "The Rain" GoG from a week or so ago. Nice little trail. ..... When I walk, I nearly always go right first ... but during this walk, we took this trail to the left first. And as we walked, I was amazed at how different the trail looked. It was the same trail I've walked dozens of times ... but by taking the trail to the left, walking the loop clock-wise instead of counter-clockwise, I saw everything on the trail from a new perspective. It was so neat. I'd be curious to know if y'all are thinking "what the heck, Mical? Why are you so excited about noticing something so small and unnoticeable to most people?" Maybe you're not thinking that ... but I think it's kind of a weird thing to blog about ... a weird thing to even think in depth about. But that's why it's grace! Don't you see? God's creation ... I've seen this trail dozens of times ... I walk it often. But by walking at a different angle, I can see it from a new perspective ... and be all the more impressed by it. Seeing the trees and grass and leaves and flowers and fallen logs and tall plants and weeds and branches and the trail itself from a different perspective made me see it in a whole new way. It was like I was walking a totally different trail. I'm not joking - it looked that different! And I was so amazed ... so awed ... that God made something so beautiful and powerful and ... wow, I can't come up with the right word for this ... something so amazing that no matter how many times we look at it, we can take some sense of awe and majesty away from it every time if we just look at it a little deeper or from a different perspective. And to think that God created that trail for me ... for us ... and the rest of His creation too. It's just grace. Grace, grace, grace, grace, grace.

GoG 100: The Life Purpose Statement

A little over a week ago, I was really struggling with my calling .... almost a crisis of calling, you could say ..... but really, I think I was just discontent. I battle that little guy a lot these days. Is it that I want to find my future husband? Is it that I want to work ALONGSIDE a youth pastor husband rather than BE the youth pastor myself? Is it me not focusing on Jesus and His perspective on things? Umm ... yes!

A week ago Sunday, I was really struggling with that little guy called discontent .... he was gnawing away at my spirit, dragging me down. I went to the altar at church on Sunday morning, my friend Jon told me he was praying for me, and I took a nap .... and SoZo was really good that night. And by the time the day was over, God had restored an eternal perspective within me. Whew! I was so thankful. ... I've battled that little guy discontent off and on throughout the week, but God is teaching me (it's a continual lesson) that I must set my mind on the things above - on HIM. I must keep an eternal perspective in all things.

A few posts from now, I'll blog about my trip to the Indiana Dunes ... and during that trip, I sat on the beach and read another chapter in Calm My Anxious Heart .... that really great book I've talked about before about another little guy called content. :) The chapter challenged its readers (in this case - me) to write a life purpose statement. The author, Linda Dillow, shared some amazing stories about some women in her life who wrote amazing life purpose statements and then lived up to them. .... I want to do that too! So I wrote a life purpose statement for my life. I wrote something down ... and then I scribbled all over the page, putting my English major skills to work - editing, pulling out vague words, putting in more specific details, pulling out dull verbs and using more descriptive ones ... the page was pretty crazy by the end of it all. And here's what I came up with ....

I will honor God with my life by maintaining an eternal perspective in all things because everything that honors God only comes from a mind and heart completely set on Him.

And my life verse is Colossians 3:2 - Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things.

Good stuff. Now, I'm not as far along in achieving this purpose as the women in Linda Dillow's book, but I have a very strong feeling that they didn't accomplish their purpose statements overnight. I'm confident that it took them a little something I like to call .... time .... to become mature and complete, not lacking anything (as a cool guy named James says). So I will strive to model my life after this verse. I won't be perfect right away. I will not achieve this purpose overnight. But isn't is a marvelous goal? Oh, my ... yes, it is!

My life has purpose ... now isn't that just another amazing little guy called grace? I think grace is my favorite little guy. :)

GoG 99: The Day with My Favorite Family

Saturday, the 10th, I spent the whole day with my favorite family in the world - the Cooks/Adamsons gang. .... Jarrod's birthday was the following Tuesday, and we all headed to Muncie for a party at his mom's house. We ate hamburgers and this yummy barbeque sausage dish, mac 'n cheese, green beans ... oh, it was really good food! Lisa is a great cook!

I rode to Muncie with Uncle Mike and Jen ... we chatted, sang southern gospel, chatted some more. I went on a walk with Uncle Mikey while we were at Lisa's house for the party. I got to hang out with UM and Jen and Adam and Kristina and little Noah and David and Kayla while they did their family pictures. And then I got to watch a movie with UM and Jen at the end of the day.

Marvelous day. A day full of grace.