Well, I am 36 weeks pregnant today with our second baby girl. I've been thinking about writing this blog post for weeks. Since my pregnancy post with Haddie was so dramatic and full of struggle but with a happy ending, I wanted to share my thoughts about Bethel's pregnancy because it has been so different.
I was totally convinced we were having a boy because I wasn't sick at all in the first trimester. I woke up feeling a bit yucky until I ate something, but no nausea - what a gift! Really, other than some yucky mornings and a growing baby bump, I couldn't even tell I was pregnant. I've had a few minor ailments here and there, but really, I think this has been the smoothest, most comfortable pregnancy a mama could ask for. Remind me of that tonight when I'm turning over every 20 minutes from some fairly severe sciatica. ;) Haha!
Don't get me wrong. Even with a super smooth pregnancy, I'm still not a fan of being pregnant. I'm definitely not my grandma who apparently has said that she felt the best in her life while she was pregnant. What the what?! But wow, this pregnancy has been perspective-changing. I have felt Bethel move almost non-stop since week 20, which leaves me awed every time I feel her. I had a bout of despair and self-condemnation and hormones that I thought might literally kill me that preceded a real breakthrough in my bondage to self-condemnation .... I am now walking so much more in the freedom of grace - thank you, Jesus! And I have been so, so thankful this pregnancy, growing in excitement about meeting Bethel, growing more in love with Haddie everyday, growing to love my husband and be thankful for our relationship, basking in our amazing support system, growing more in my walk with Christ in this season of life than ever before, and so much more.
It's just amazing what I've learned during this pregnancy. Sure, I've felt a lot better carrying Bethel than I did carrying Haddie, so it's been easier to have a good attitude. But I think God is ready to teach us something amazing (and difficult) every single day of our lives and in every season. We just have to be ready and open. ... I was pretty closed off for a lot of my pregnancy with Haddie, and I've definitely had some rough days and weeks with Bethel. But wow! God is so faithful to teach me, and I am so thankful for that!
I'm so excited to meet you, Little B! You're our next big adventure!!!