So ... the following was a blog post I wrote the very first day of this year. I reread it tonight and thought "Oh my gosh! I haven't done this at all this year!" I haven't been "all in" this year. Ugh! I've been so self-centered for the past several months. I've been watching too much TV and not reading my Bible enough and not spending time praying for others like I used to ... and sinning more. Wow ....
So I want to take a look at this post again.
Here it is ....
Today, I was brushing my teeth, getting ready for a cold day of football with some good friends ... and I stopped brushing in the middle of this thought ...
I was thinking about last night. I met with some close friends for a New Year's Eve get-together. We played games, ate some good food, and laughed a lot together. It was a good time. While I was there, though, I got to thinking about how my friendships with these friends have grown a little distant lately. They are, without a doubt, some of my best friends, but we haven't spent much time together lately ... or really talked much either. We've all just been so busy! So we haven't had (or made) the time to nurture our friendships recently. And that's where the thought started. While I was brushing my teeth, my mind connected this thought with my relationship with Jesus. ..... When I don't spend time with Him, our relationship becomes a bit distant. Just like my best friends and I haven't been staying in touch as well and have grown a little distant so has my relationship with Jesus become distant because I haven't been really communing with Him for several months.
It's so true. Relationship is about togetherness. It's about that word communion that I threw at y'all in an earlier post ... it's about "an interchange of thoughts, about giving and receiving" ... things you can't do if you don't spend time with one another.
On Sunday, my pastor continued our study of the book of John, and toward the end of his sermon, he said three little words that I want to dedicate my life to this 2010.
I'm all in.
Yep ... this year, I want to wake up each day with "I'm all in" on my lips. I want to say "Lord, I'm yours. Use me. Mold me. Break me if need be. Just do your work in my life today. I want to be all for you." And part of that ... if not nearly all of it ... is communing with God. I can't be "all in" if I don't spend time with God. ....... So that be the goal. :) That be the grace God showed me today. GOD WANTS TO BE IN RELATIONSHIP WITH ME! He's been calling. He's been waiting. Which is grace in action. Grace is getting what we don't deserve. I don't deserve a God who wants to be in relationship with me so badly that He'll wait forever for me to come around if He needs to. He patiently waits at the door of my heart, gently knocking, saying "If you'd only let me in, you could have a life more abundant than you could ever imagine."
God's grace. Thank you, Jesus.
So today and everyday, Lord ... I'm all in.
... "Jesus came that we may have life and have it abundantly."
Man. That's deep stuff ... commitment kinds of stuff. And I didn't COMMIT myself to Christ this 2010. But wait! It's still 2010! And even if it wasn't, I could still start over. And that's what I'm doing - now.
Lord, forgive me for my selfishness.
Help me be all in.